Angry, Angry Wizards
by sakurademonalchemist
Summary: Finally letting his long patience run out during the hearing to determine his fate, Harry gets a one-way ticket to Japan as a way for the Minister to be legally rid of him. Just one problem...no one told Harry about the aliens and their insane caretaker! Now he's stuck in a battle royale with a prize he's not even interested in! Can Harry survive his flock? Harry with minor harem
1. Chapter 1

**Just to be clear, this takes place two years before the main Sekirei timeline. Also Happy birthday, Have a Little Feith!  
**

* * *

For the first time in his life, Harry was glad he had the patience of a saint. It meant that when the fuse finally hit the end, it went off with such an explosive force that it left nothing standing in it's wake.

And in this case, that fuse finally reached the end of the line when he realized he was being forced into a full Wizangamot trial instead of being given a reprimand from the office that watched Underage Magic.

The second he saw where he was supposed to sit, he felt his mind go red with rage and his unhealthy suppression of anger finally blew.

Oh Fudge was going down, even if he had to strangle the chickenshit bastard barehanded.

Harry showed admirable control over his anger, right up until Fudge started cutting him off.

Finally he couldn't take it anymore.

"Oh shut the fuck up, you blubbering sack of shit! If you're that determined to get rid of me, then for magic's sake why don't you ship me off to a foreign country or something? It's not like I actually _care_ if this country burns to the ground because you rule over a bunch of sheep!" said Harry loudly enough to echo across the _entire_ courtroom.

Silence reigned.

Seeing the shocked and scandalized expressions, Harry glared at them all.

"For fuck's sake people, I'm _fifteen_. Does it bother _none_ of you that whatever infraction I committed by casting the bloody patronus would qualify as a case of _UNDERAGE_ magic, especially considering I haven't even sat for my OWLs yet? What if I was one of your children dragged into a full Wizangamot session for something as simple as a stinging hex?!" said Harry, irate.

With no one willing to speak while he was on a roll, Harry continued. The more he spoke, the more the older and supposedly _wiser_ wizards and witches started to glare at Fudge.

Harry had unknowingly given the cowardly Minister an idea to solve most of his problems. Which was why, almost immediately after the court room let out (Harry was cleared of all charges) Harry found himself dragged into another room by Aurors under the orders of the Minister himself.

The green eyed wizard glared at the cowardly Minister.

"It seems we have ourselves a dilemma, Mr. Potter. You see, I don't like having young upstarts stirring up dissent, much less proclaiming You-Know-Who is back. Which is why I'm willing to offer you a deal. An all expenses paid portkey to the country of your choice, and the ability to move your gold out of Gringotts no questions asked."

"And in return?"

"You agree to keep your mouth shut about You-Know-Who and don't go back to Hogwarts," said Fudge flatly.

"Quick question. If I make a magically binding contract with you that states that in no way shape or form that any witch, wizard or squib can return me to England or the UK, will it apply to everyone that's ever lived in England for more than seven years or gone to Hogwarts because your the Minister for Magic?" asked Harry flatly.

"Of course! Why, it was the Minister for Magic that signed the treaty with the King of England many years ago that gave us complete autonomy to self govern," said Fudge.

Harry smirked.

"In that case, would you like some advice to insure that the students have the proper...respect...for whomever you chose to act as a replacement teacher and make Dumbledore's life harder than it needs to be?"

Fudge listened with an attentive expression. When he heard the outline of Harry's suggestion, he was positively falling over himself with glee, because no one could fault him for trying to improve standards at Hogwarts!

In the span of a few hours, Harry had what little he wanted to take with him, a card that lifted the Underage Magic detection on him until he reached whatever country he opted to live in, and a magically binding agreement with everyone who had ever lived or stayed in Europe that prevented them from dragging him back to the UK without his permission first. And it had to be willing.

Four years of Hogwarts taught Harry one thing. Be as thorough as possible and never leave any loophole unchecked. And just to be sure everyone knew who's fault it was if Voldemort decided to make himself known, he even convinced the Minister to post the contract in the Prophet in it's entirety, even if the man did slander his name a little.

In exchange Harry made a magically binding oath not to speak against the Ministry while Fudge was Minister. If he was kicked out of office, then what did Fudge have to care what Harry said about the post or the people who had it?

He also got papers stating he was fully emancipated from both worlds (mostly to avoid having some idiot trying to send him back to his aunt's home), had all his gold moved to a Swiss account that he could access online (thus negating any chance of a wizard getting their hands on it with a mere key), and enough muggle money to live on his own until he either found a new school or got a job.

So what if Fudge had his wand snapped just in case? It was a stick, and odds were he'd be able to find a new one anyway.

Harry cheerfully said goodbye to England, and was happily humming _"God Save the Queen"_ , all the while thinking of the chaos he left in his wake.

Sure, he'd missing his friends and Sirius, but this was his life and he was sick and tired of having to fight for his life every year in a bloody school.

Besides, he really didn't want to be around for the fall out when the Queen got the owl with the copy of the contract between King Edward and the Minister, and how many breaches there were in the thing in the past hundred years _alone_.

To hell with England and the UK.

Hello Japan.

* * *

Thanks to the miracle of a magical passport that automatically changed to suit whatever the current standards were for the muggle version, and the fact he had his emancipation papers that clearly stated he wasn't some random runaway from another country, Harry patiently walked to the counter that sorted the incoming traffic from people who weren't from Japan originally. He didn't question the odd machine, as he hadn't exactly kept up to date with the newest developments even while he lived in Privet Drive.

He wasn't encouraged to think above his station there, so he didn't see any reason to tempt his uncle into another shouting match that might end with pain.

So naturally he was very confused when the machine made some strange noise, and the end result had him waiting in an adjacent area waiting for whatever random technician they could scrounge up to clear the matter. From what he had been able to tell, this mostly involved retrying the machine again and being given a rather decent sum of hush money so as not to create a fuss.

He had the feeling that the poor man who had to sit there and use the machine on the incoming arrivals was beyond relieved when Harry's natural British politeness made the entire thing easier than it had to be. Some of the Americans were positively belligerent about the whole process, which only reaffirmed his relief to have chosen a country as out of the way as Japan.

That and he wasn't entirely sure that the magical half of America was as separated from the English as it's mundane half, and had thought it best not to test fate.

So naturally when he realized that the ones who came to fix the machine (after having the same results confirmed a third time by a harried man) was a rather un-amused woman with prematurely white hair and a woman radiating bloodlust almost without bothering to care about what other people would think about the matter, he realized Potter Luck had decided to strike early.

He didn't even look the least bit impressed, having already guessed why the second woman was there.

"If you're hear to kill me, then for the love of whatever god exists just get it over with so I can head to whatever afterlife awaits me. If you're here to accuse me of something, then I'll happily inform you that I've never even _been_ to Japan before in my life, much less know how to speak said language," he said in a completely flat, unimpressed voice at the show of force, despite the fact that the second woman had yet to even _draw_ her sword.

The first woman with the clipboard shot him an odd Look. The second one opened her eyes just enough to reveal eyes almost as gray as her hair.

"I like this one," she said in accented English. She was _definitely_ amused by the fact he either had a false sense of bravado or was so blasé about death that he didn't even bother to show fear in front of her.

"Let's get this over with. I have better things to do with my time than worry about corporate espionage from teenagers," said the first woman. "Name?"

"Harry Evans."

Considering how famous the name Harry Potter was, he went with his mother's maiden name instead.

"Age?"

"Fifteen, and before you ask I'm emancipated and not a runaway," deadpanned Harry.

She raised an eyebrow.

"Parents?"

"Dead since I was fifteen months old and my former legal guardian was beyond thrilled to sign the papers that emancipated me, according to what I was told," replied Harry, his voice never once leaving the flat tone since the meeting began.

"Schooling history?"

"Home schooled, though I wouldn't be surprised if that hag of a woman deliberately lost the records just to spite me," replied Harry. "What's this all about anyway?"

She gave him a flat look, her expression not changing.

"The machine was calibrated to detect criminals on Interpol's list, among others. But it was originally tested among the MBI staff. Your DNA had a partial hit with one of the scientists."

Harry felt like banging his head against the table repeatedly.

Of course he would fly halfway across the world just to run into a relative.

"How close a relative?"

"Second cousins at the very least," said the woman.

"Terrific. Am I required to meet them, or can I just get on with my life instead?" he asked tiredly.

"You don't want to meet your cousin?" she asked shrewdly.

Harry looked her dead in the eye and said "My only experience with family involves three people so obsessed with the idea of normal that anything that doesn't fit into that category is therefor 'freakish'. This includes everything from foreigners to those who are in a same-sex relationship, and thus they are treated like shit. Unless they're in a position that actually _requires_ my relatives to be nice, in which case they'll do most of the insulting behind the person's back."

Seeing the woman stare at him in disbelief, he hammered the fact in that he had no idea how to handle _nice_ relatives, he continued with the way they had raised their son.

"And that's not getting into the fact that my aunt and legal guardian helped to teach her son that it was acceptable to hunt me down, beat the living shit out of me and treating others fairly was a foreign concept and thus to be avoided, all the while spoiling him to the point that he will literally _whine_ for hours if he so much as misses five minutes of his favorite shows, even if it's to do something as benign as homework."

"I call bullshit," said the woman flatly.

"If you ever met Petunia Dursley of Surrey, England, then I assure you that you'd believe that statement and more, before pitying me for having to stay with them for fourteen long, painful years," deadpanned Harry, giving her a look of sarcastic amusement. The irony was that he _understated_ how bad they were.

She looked him in the eye and silently came to the conclusion that this was a kid who could lie and beat a polygraph at the same time. It was then that she noticed something about her companion, and mentally swore.

The other woman was _reacting_ to the brat! Could this day get any worse?

"Fine. Purpose for visit?"

"Does actually having a life without the threat of someone trying to kill me count?" he asked honestly.

She stared at him.

"What."

"I came here to get away from England, because a mad man who ran a terrorist group from the sixties is making a comeback, and he's been dead set on killing me since I survived the attack that killed my parents before I was two," said Harry.

"Can you prove he's back?"

"I highly doubt you'd believe me any more than the Minister did when I tried to tell him. He was so firmly in denial he did everything in his power to get rid of me, to the point he paid for my plane ticket just so he wouldn't have to deal with the man being back," said Harry without any hesitation.

She was having trouble deciding what to do. On one hand, he was clearly a teenager with no parental supervision who had the bad luck to be directly related to the idiot she worked for. On the other, the fact she had nothing to hold him on made the entire mess not her problem so long as he didn't become an Ashikabi.

Eyeing Karasuba, she hoped like hell that the kid didn't wing the psychotic Sekirei.

As if in response to her fervent hope,. Potter Luck kicked in once more with a vengeance.

In the brief span she took her eyes off him, Karasuba had practically lodged her tongue into his throat. Ethereal wings appeared and Takami started banging her head against the table.

Harry managed to push the now highly amused Sekirei off him, feeling thoroughly violated.

"Dammit it all to the fiery pits of hell! You just _had_ to react to the foreign kid and wing yourself without considering the fact I pay you!"

Karasuba smirked at her, and if her hair wasn't already prematurely white, she was positive this day would have turned it gray from stress.

"Someone mind explaining what the bloody hell is going on?!"

Realizing a solution that would dump most of her current problems on someone who completely deserved the migraines, Takami looked him dead in the eye.

"Good news, you're going to be meeting your cousin. Bad news, now that this alien tart has claimed you, leaving Shin Tokyo is going to be impossible," said Takami deadpan.

Harry seemed to share the same opinion as she did, because he _did_ start banging his head against the table.

"Why. Does. This. Always. Happen. To. Me."

"Because whatever god exists hates you as much as he does me," said Takami.

* * *

Minaka took one look at Harry, then at Takami.

"Why is this _my_ problem?" he asked confused.

Normally he'd give a rather vague speech telling the new Ashikabi they were now stuck in his game, then ignore the fact they existed unless they did something to earn his attention. While Karasuba had apparently winged herself to the foreign kid, he failed to see why the British teen was now his issue to deal with.

Takami looked extremely gleeful as she explained.

"He's your cousin, a minor (though he's legally allowed to live on his own), and he's Karasuba's Ashikabi. And since I'm not directly related to him, I have no reason to clear up this rather large mess," she said happily. Then she left him alone with a new Ashikabi, one of the most bloodthirsty Sekirei released, and a awkward silence that seemed to raise the tension levels to the point you could cut it with a knife.

"So..."

The kid rolled his eyes.

"Look, just help me get an apartment or something so I can either continue my education or find a job."

Minaka seized upon the perfect way to solve most of his current problems.

"She has a job, and she's been needing a minder for _years_. If you agree to sign an employment contract we can get you some home schooling until you graduate high school," said Minaka.

Harry stared at him.

"Just to be clear, any attempts to make me leave this city will result in violent, almost certainly lethal response, right?" he asked.

"Karasuba's main job is to keep her own kind in the city, mostly for their protection. And since you're her destined one, that means she'll take any such attempts to remove you personally and she has no inhibitions when it comes to lethal force. Your only job is making sure she only kills those she's allowed to, and not random people who piss her off," confirmed Minaka.

"...Where do I sign again?" asked Harry.


	2. Chapter 2

It was official. She loved her Ashikabi and would gleefully murder any idiot who tried to separate them. Harry's reasoning for why she _shouldn't_ murder someone in cold blood was so highly entertaining she went out of her way to find new people to kill. Plus the looks on people's faces hearing a fifteen year old British teenager explain things in rather graphic detail on why she shouldn't murder someone without at least making a point to keep the blood off _him_...she got the giggles just imagining it.

Takami's face when she heard said explanations were even more hilarious.

However, after the first five times he did that, and she realized he was being entirely serious, she used her power in MBI to do some digging. And what she found left her beyond furious.

She had thought the brat was being sarcastic about the way his aunt treated him. What she found out from the neighbors on Privet Drive painted a much darker picture.

Not only were the neighbors practically trained to ignore blatant abuse and extremely bad parenting, but everyone seemed to blame the crimes of this...Dudley Dursley and his gang on Harry, despite the fact he no longer lived in England. Further investigating into Dudley's grades revealed Harry had kept his own just barely below his cousin...but she knew for a fact he was highly intelligent, because he was already in college-level classes once he had the chance to catch up.

She had sincere doubts that the boy was as stupid as the "aunt" claimed, or that he was a delinquent.

In fact all signs practically reeked of child abuse, or some extreme neglect. Hell, there weren't any pictures of the boy in the house, despite the fact that he had claimed the house as his place of residence for thirteen years. There were many, many pictures of the other child.

Takami had read the reports, and any doubts about Harry's claims his aunt had signed the papers without any hesitation were dead after the investigators turned in their findings.

It was little wonder the boy had been so adamant about not being sent back to England.

At first, Harry didn't know what to think of Karasuba. Once the situation had been explained in full to him about the "game", he found himself completely disinterested with the prize. He was, however, thanking every deity that Takami had been able to convince Karasuba that she wasn't allowed to jump him when he wasn't expecting it.

She had put her foot down around the terrifying woman (to everyone but Harry apparently) and explained to the woman more than ten years his senior that she couldn't sleep with someone who was just a little over fifteen. Though she had also warned Harry that he was on his own when he hit sixteen.

But the longer he was around her, the more he found himself relaxing around her. Which made a lot of people a little freaked about being around him for some reason.

Karasuba had made her possession over him rather clear. She wouldn't tolerate the idea of anyone taking _her_ Ashikabi away.

Today he was going to observe a 'sparring' match between Karasuba and Haihane.

Harry walked to the viewing platform, saw the clawed Sekirei going at it with his Sekirei...and it took him fifteen minutes to realize something weird was going on.

"Takami-san, am I hallucinating or is Haihane acting...off?"

Takami blinked, before watching the match closer. She swore, loudly.

"She's reacting."

"To whom?" asked Harry.

The answer to that question became painfully obvious as Karasuba reluctantly stopped the match and brought Haihane with her. The closer she got to Harry, the worse it got. Takami swore even louder.

Haihane was reacting to _Harry_. Of course he would attract the more bloodthirsty ones.

She pinched the bridge of her nose.

"Isn't this a problem? I mean most girls don't really react well to having another added..." said Harry nervously.

Takami snorted.

"Human females are raised to think that the idea of a harem is demeaning. Sekirei not only don't care, they encourage you to add more to the flock," deadpanned Takami. It was good to see that the boy could act _normally_ for his age.

Karasuba snorted.

"We're born with a submissive trait, brat. So long as an Ashikabi orders it, we'll follow through. We might not like it, but we'll do it."

Something seemed to go through his head, before he paled.

"Dear gods... Hermione must never find out about this. She was bad enough to deal with when she found out about the people who cleaned the school..." he muttered to himself.

"I thought you were home schooled?" said Takami, eyes narrowing.

"I went to a boarding school that's so far out of the way and so exclusive they don't even have a website. And it's in a literal castle next to a massive forest and a rather large lake that empties out to the sea. It's easier to claim home school that is it to explain about the fact that their idea of education is beyond archaic and borders on prehistoric. They don't even have functioning electricity and it's a miracle they had normal plumbing," deadpanned Harry.

Takami's eyes narrowed.

"I wondered why it took you so long to catch up to high school level. What sort of school doesn't teach basic language and maths?"

"One that makes the students wear dress _robes_ to formal events, and still thinks it's in the Victorian era. They had the students write all their homework out in parchment, and heaven help you if you want to look something up. Half the books in the library don't even come with a bloody index," said Harry.

Takami was appalled at the very idea.

"You and I are going to have a very long discussion about your former school. In the meantime you might as well wing Haihane. I suppose it's better that the Disciplinary Squad all react to the same person, and not forced like that idiot was planning."

For the second time, Harry was practically pounced on by a reacting Sekirei. This time though, he felt what was happening. Whatever Sekirei were (Takami claimed they were aliens, but he had his doubts) when they were "winged", they were literally bonding their powers to the magical cores of their partners.

* * *

Takami was at her wits end trying to find a certain pain in the ass. Though to be fair, he was still much easier to deal with than his cousin...even if he was the Ashikabi to two bloodthirsty and vicious aliens.

Finally her search took her to the adjustment labs...where she couldn't help but stare at the sight she found.

Harry was sitting calmly making little lights for the youngest Sekirei currently being adjusted to chase after, which only made the little fairy image stronger. Shiina, which was the closest thing to an older brother she had, was watching contently as Harry walked him through the finer points of...

"Are you teaching him how to garden?" she asked baffled. Shiina's power meant he _killed_ plants. Kuu was the one that grew the things.

Harry looked up, surprised, before rolling his eyes.

"Shiina is surprisingly adept at flower arranging, regardless of his powers, and Kuu likes to color."

"Are you sure you should be in the same room?" she asked pointedly.

"Kuu isn't my type, and I'm quite happy being attracted to girls, thank you very much. Besides, neither of them are reacting and I was bored. I like kids more than adults anyway."

"...Is that a flower crown?" she asked, trying not to laugh.

"Made of seeds I picked up in the gardening store for Kuu to play with, yes," said Harry.

Takami was clearly imagining Kuu doing this to Karasuba and Haihane, and was trying not to laugh.

"What are you doing in here anyway?"

"Karasuba is busy, Haihane is still in training, and I refuse to get stuck with Benitsubasa if I can help it," said Harry flatly.

"Just try not to wing any of the younger Sekirei. It's bad enough Karasuba has been venting her...frustration... on the new recruits," deadpanned Takami.

* * *

 _A few hours later..._

As Harry was leaving the adjustment labs for Kuu and Shiina, he was damn near bowled over by a woman with a rather impressive bust, looking very upset. Her hair almost looked like it was made of ice and snow. Her eyes were very expressive.

"Are you alright?"

"Hide me! That idiot is planning to do the adjustment himself without Takami supervising!" she begged.

Under normal circumstances she wouldn't have said anything, much less bolted from the lab during adjustment. But Takeru was the most incompetent scientists in the lab, and whenever he did them it hurt. A lot.

None of the Sekirei liked him being part of the team at all, and they usually tried to get of the process if he were around. Takami was very close to firing him anyway.

Harry heard someone coming. He reached into his bag and pulled out his old invisibility cloak and threw it over her.

"Stay behind me and keep quiet. I'll ask Takami to sort this out once I see her, but until then you can stay close," he told her. She nodded fervently, glad he was shielding her from the idiot.

Takeru Tokiomi came out of the lab at the far end of the hallway with an angry look on his face. He noticed Harry and sneered, but otherwise kept his mouth shut. The fact he was Minaka's second cousin (and Karasuba's Ashikabi) was very well known by now.

Most of the scientists considered him Karasuba's pet Ashikabi, as he was generally rather passive.

"Potter."

"Wanker," he replied evenly in English. Most of the scientists spoke English as a second (or third) language, but Takeru was one of the few who didn't. Or at the very least it was highly limited.

Much to the amusement of Harry, that limited vocabulary didn't include insults. Much less the British ones he liked to use.

"Have you seen 07?" he asked flatly, annoyed because he didn't know what Harry had called him.

"Who?"

"Number 07, Akitsu. She ditched her final adjustment and I have to be part of three more today," he gritted out.

"Oh, you mean the unwinged Sekirei with icy hair. She went that way and took a right," said Harry cheerfully.

"Thank you," said Takeru, not meaning it at all. He followed the directions blindly, unaware of the time-delayed jinx on his shoes that would lead to him tripping into one of the worst areas of the building.

The personal bathing room of the Disciplinary Squad, where Karasuba was currently taking a relaxing bath.

Akitsu waited until she was sure he was properly gone before removing the hood of the cloak.

"Thank you," she said emphatically.

"What did he do?"

"He said something about altering the adjustments Takami was planning, so I got out of there. I wouldn't trust anything that _man_ had in mind."

"You can hide with me and my flock until Takami returns from using Minaka as her slap-test dummy."

Karasuba was in a very good mood cleaning a substance Harry pretended not to notice off her sword. Haihane was likewise cleaning something that smelled of copper (among other things) off her claws. They took one look at Akitsu and raised their eyebrows.

"I would ask if you've winged another, but even I can see she doesn't have the crest on her back," said Karasuba.

"One of the dimwitted scientists wanted to alter the adjustment plan Takami made. She disagreed with the idea, so she asked me to hide her."

"Number?" asked Karasuba.

"07."

"Name?"

"Akitsu."

"How far along are you?"

"This was supposed to be my last adjustment," said Akitsu.

"There you are, you stupid bitch! Do you have any idea the hell I went through because you took off from your appointment?!"

Karasuba and Haihane's eyes narrowed at him. The sudden spike in killing intent was probably the only clue the fool had that he had wandered into the wrong room.

"Oh, so this is the idiot who tried to...adjust... you. In that case, feel free to stay as long as you like while we remind him what a _bad idea_ it is to interrupt us," said Karasuba pleasantly.

There was the distinct smell of piss from Takeru.

"Yes, let's have a nice long...talk...with the scientist," said Haihane, eyes gleaming with her claws.

"No! Please! Mercy!"

Harry cocked his head and asked "What's mercy? Is it edible?"

Karasuba grinned, knowing it was Harry's weird sense of humor again.

"That's the guy I take orders from."

Takeru left bloody furrows in the carpet, trying to avoid his fate.

Akitsu watched the thing with something akin to shock and amusement.

She could feel herself growing warm, almost flush. Harry seemed to realize what was going on, because he looked rather panicked.

"Now Akitsu, don't do anything... _rash!"_ yelped Harry as he was glomped and kissed before he could properly run away.

Karasuba and Haihane returned, fresh blood on their weapons, to find Akitsu had winged herself to him.

"I should feel annoyed, but seeing that look on his face is beyond hilarious," said Karasuba after a moment.

* * *

"What. Did. You. Do."

Takami looked beyond pissed. Not only had Karasuba and Haihane rendered that annoying idiot unable to walk, much less do his job, but Harry had winged a Sekirei who wasn't scheduled to be released for a full two months!

"It's not my fault! Akitsu practically crashed into me, begging me to hide her from that idiot because he was going to alter the adjustments that you ordered without telling you first! None of the Sekirei trusted that idiot! And he stumbled into Karasuba and Haihane taking their bath!"

Takami glared at him. She had reviewed the security tapes the second she found out that the idiot was in the ICU. He had brought his removal on himself pissing off Karasuba. However Akitsu... she had practically jumped Harry from being that close.

"You are not allowed to visit any of the other unwinged Sekirei except Kuusano and Shiina. Am. I. Clear."

"Yes ma'am."

"If you let those two run loose again, I'll dock your pay," she said ominously.

Harry tilted his head.

"But I don't actually _need_ the cash I get from keeping Karasuba and Haihane from going on killing sprees to get by. I still have my dad's inheritance and the investments I've been making since I found out I was stuck here," said Harry innocently.

"What investments?!"

Harry went to his tablet and pulled up his stock portfolio for her to look at. It took exactly three-point-one seconds before she nearly had a heart attack.

She looked at him with dead eyes as she said faintly... "You're the majority stock holder for MBI?"

She could believe it, if only because Minaka could care less about the money.

"Why do you also have a rather substantial folder for Higa's company?" she asked baffled.

"Can you think of something more effective than threatening to pull the plug on his newest and most substantial investor?"

Takami stared at him. Harry could be a terrifying kid when he put his mind to it.


	3. Chapter 3

"You know, most people would be appalled at the idea of a fifteen, almost sixteen year old brat in control of a medical company and about to have a hostile takeover of it's rival," said Takami blandly.

"So why aren't you?"

"Have you seen that idiot of a cousin?" deadpanned Takami.

Harry cast a glance at the cackling Minaka as he explained the 'Sekirei Game' to yet another recruit, before looking at Takami.

"Point taken. On the plus side, when he finally pisses me off enough that I expose the actual owner of MBI to the world, I fully intend to make sure everyone in the game is alerted to the fact that the fighting bit is actually voluntary," said Harry.

"Well if you're going to be in charge of the Sekirei, what's the prize going to be?" asked Takami.

"Depends. It could be anything that is humanly possibly like a permanent job, money, an expensive medical treatment... But I am _not_ about to hand over those tacky rocks like party favors," deadpanned Harry flatly.

"And once again I am reminded why I like the teenager with anger issues over my current boss and former lover," said Takami.

"But I do approve of the 'no travel outside the city' rule. With how paranoid governments have become about their fellow humans, learning about a species that can interbreed is only going to make things worse. And I don't want them to bitch about Karasuba's methods in keeping her kind safe," said Harry.

Karasuba cheerfully waved from where she was sharpening her sword.

Harry suddenly blinked.

"Wait, did you just say..."

"I was young, stupid, and my two children are thankfully nothing like their father, though Yukari needs to ease off the manga."

"You have my deepest sympathies and the fervent hope that they are nothing like their father when they get older," said Harry.

Takami's lips twitched upward.

"Remind me again why you haven't just taken over the company yet?"

"People won't take me seriously until I'm at least eighteen and homework is bad enough without having to add corporate paperwork to it," deadpanned Harry. "And as amusing as it might sound, I'm not stupid enough to dump the boring things on you like he does."

"And once again you remind me why I'm not more upset about you being the actual one in charge."

"I might have a way to get him off the idea of bringing back the 'Age of the Gods' and all that rot, if they ever piss me off enough. I'm sure the English won't like it, but I'm never going back so who cares?"

If introducing Minaka to the English magical society and proving he was a 'wizard' didn't get him to leave the poor aliens alone, nothing would. Either they'd kill him or he'd change things.

He couldn't _possibly_ make it worse. Just look what they were dealing with NOW.

Inbred hicks, backwards laws that made no sense, stuck in the Victorian era and behind on most technology.

He firmly suspected that indoor plumbing and the Knight Bus was a fluke of the highest order. Either that or the muggleborns did it themselves just to piss off the pure bloods.

Sure he might make them go through hell and possibly expose magic, but it was still less headache inducing than what was currently around.

To that end Harry was going to make sure Minaka firmly memorized the infamous Evil Overlord List and let him have at it.

"I don't know what you're planning, but stop the evil laughter," said Takami in her best mom voice.

"Just imagining the chaos I'd unleash on my home country by tossing Minaka into a secret society full of idiots. If he wants the Age of the Gods so damn badly, he can have fun playing those morons," said Harry vindictively.

"...Are they the reason your education was so horribly behind, and why you had to do so much make up work?"

"Yes. They refuse to even _consider_ electricity as a way to light the school," said Harry in disgust.

"Then they deserve whatever is coming to them," said Takami flatly. Anyone who would willfully hold back such vital parts of a child's education deserved the headache of dealing with Minaka.

Harry beamed at her.

* * *

"So...exactly how in the _hell_ did you idiots drag me into a gods-be-damned _host club_ and think I would be okay with it?!" said Harry in a loud voice in slightly accented Japanese. His ability to speak the native language was almost perfect, and he had even begun learning other languages like Chinese, Arabic, and Yiddish, though he was a bit rough on the last one.

The one thing that amused him the most was that when people heard he was an exchange student and that his first language was English, they automatically assumed he was American, not British.

"Keep your voice down!" hissed Umino.

"And what are you complaining about? Weren't you bitching that your aunt had cut you off from your allowance? We're just trying to help you find an easy job. Unless, you're you know..." said Jake, an American from Texas.

Harry's eyebrows twitched, and the gray haired host Kagari was clearly trying not to grin, or worse, laugh at his expression.

"First off, most of my money is in stocks, and therefor tied up. Secondly, she's not my aunt and I don't _have_ an allowance. I generally dislike going on spending sprees to begin with, because I don't see the point of them. And Third, I. Am. Not. _Gay._ If I have to call in my girlfriend to get that point across, then I will, but don't come whining to me when she scares the piss out of you for dragging me here!"

Kagari lost his ability to hold in his amusement, because he was laughing while disguising it as a coughing fit.

"Choke on your cigarette there, Kagari-san?" said Harry sweetly, though he was clearly seething.

"You're threatening your friends with your girlfriend?"

"She's a sword nut that I have to keep in check because people piss her off easily, and her friends happen to be a knife otaku and someone who's a bit too fond of the cold," deadpanned Harry.

"Sounds rough."

"On top of that I have to deal with a jackass of a cousin with a god complex who finds it funny to meddle in the lives of others just because he can, and the woman I work for is stuck cleaning up after him. I swear she gets far too much practice in slapping him with her clipboard. At least she's cut back on the smoking," said Harry exasperated.

Kagari chuckled.

"Sounds like you need someone to drink with and complain to that won't make comments on your...preferences."

"These two are fine, but they're idiots," said Harry. "And I would love a platonic, friendly drink."

"Dude...did we just get ditched by the Brit and the host?" said Jake.

"That would be a yes. Want to hit that strip club three blocks from here?"

"Hells yeah!"

* * *

 _With Harry..._

The more he talked to the kid, the more Kagari seemed to open up around him. Apparently Harry could recognize a Sekirei when he ran into one.

"So every time your cousin pisses you off, you tell Akitsu to freeze his underwear? Isn't that against the rules?"

"No overt powers against those not in the know or unrelated to the game. He's one of the scientists involved with the project, so Takami said it was fine. Besides, it's either he gets blue balls or Takami slaps him even harder with her clipboard. She still can't believe we're related, or that I have such weird luck," said Harry, sipping his sake.

"Would I know him?"

"You'd recognize him pretty damn quick, but like I said I prefer we weren't related at all. He's a damn idiot."

"Can't be worst than that damn Takeru," muttered Homura.

"Karasuba and Haihane rendered that jackass a paraplegic. He got a nice severance pay before Takami kicked his ass to the curb. It really didn't help that he almost screwed up Akitsu's last adjustment so badly that she would have had to self-wing herself just to survive it."

Homura almost choked on his drink.

"That bad?"

"Minaka was really pissed with him. Apparently the idiot got off on making the Sekirei suffer, so they didn't exactly do everything in their power to 'help' him when Karasuba was done with his ass."

"Good riddance. That bastard was part of the reason why my adjustment was so misaligned," said Homura in disgust.

He didn't know if it was the scientists fault or his own biology.

"If worse comes to worse, you can always come to me and ask for help. From what I can tell, this 'winging' process mostly involves the Sekirei bonding with the 'core' inside humanity, thus allowing a soul bond to occur. The human acts as a filter and amplifier, thus giving something to balance out the powers of the Sekirei."

Homura downed another glass.

"I wish I could kill Minaka. Thanks to his demented game, my kind is forced to suffer so that the power hungry humans can play."

"Oh trust me, when I get pissed off enough at him the Sekirei Game will be abolished and the S-Plan will be put back into place. By the way, when you get back to the Inn tell Matsu we know where she is but Minaka has cooled down enough that he won't actively hunt her down so long as she doesn't go handing out that rock she stole."

Homura choked on his drink, and had to wait until it cleared his airways before he could speak.

"What?"

"MBI knows where Matsu is. The jackass Minaka has calmed down and decided not to go after her for it since she's clearly hiding under Miya's protection. So long as she doesn't steal anything else or do anything to ruin his fun, he's willing to look the other way if she leaves the house."

Homura could detect no lies in his voice.

"And Karasuba?"

" _I'm_ her handler. So long as Matsu doesn't do anything stupid like try to abolish the game or take out the company to allow the Sekirei the freedom of leaving the city I could care less where she goes or what she does."

Homura's eyes grew hard.

"Why not? This game is geared specifically to wipe my kind out."

"I'm the majority shareholder of MBI, and the 'no leaving city limits' rule is actually there to protect you, not to keep you contained in a cage. Ask Matsu what happened to number 88 when 108 was taken," said Harry flatly.

* * *

When Homura had Matsu investigate "Harry Potter" the next morning (once his hangover had passed and he remembered Harry's message to her), the entire house was in shock.

Harry practically owned MBI, but he allowed Minaka to continue acting as CEO because he didn't want to deal with the paperwork. All the stocks Minaka had in the city and his own company were in his cousin's name, save for a few hundred of them. As if that wasn't shocking enough, Harry also owned the majority of stocks in the Higa conglomerate, MBI's main rival.

The biggest shock Homura got was when Matsu displayed his Ashikabi profile.

Harry had three Sekirei, one of which was a familiar face to all Sekirei for ominous reasons.

Number 04, Karasuba.

Homura paled. He had been two feet from the Ashikabi of the Black Sekirei, and he hadn't even realized it. But he did remember the message Harry had given him for Matsu.

"The Black Sekirei's Ashikabi had a message for me?" blinked Matsu.

"He said that you are free to leave the house so long as you don't do anything to jeopardize the game or piss him off. Minaka has either decided to ignore the fact you stole something important or forgotten about it entirely. They also know you're here, but they're not willing to piss off Miya for obvious reasons," said Homura.

"And Karasuba?"

"He could care less, and that he's _her_ handler," said Homura.

Matsu looked very unsure. She did want to leave the house, but she was terrified of Karasuba or the Disciplinary squad coming down on her like lightning from above if she did.

Uzume provided the perfect solution.

"If they really don't care, you can go out in a disguise! If nothing else I can bring you straight back here!" she said helpfully.

It would take a few weeks before Matsu was completely comfortable being around people again. Apparently this Harry had been entirely honest when he said that MBI had zero interest in going after her now that Minaka had either cooled off or forgotten what she had done.

* * *

Harry winged his fourth Sekirei during a drunken haze to celebrate his sixteenth birthday. Well that and Minaka was being a bigger pain in the ass than usual. Takami had given him the green light to get smashed, since he had been keeping Karasuba on a rather tight leash lately. Musubi was scheduled to be released in the next year or so, and she was getting antsy for their duel.

One moment he and a rather flirty woman with large breasts were drinking on a high rise that was still being constructed moon watching (he liked heights, enough said), the next she was practically pawing at him in the midst of a reaction, before she firmly kissed him on the lips. If not for the fact he had applied sticking charms before he started drinking for safety reasons, they might have fallen off the building.

As it was, Harry sobered up enough to realize that he had just gotten another member of his flock. On the plus side, Karasuba's restless energy was about to be put to use.

Takami had been quite clear to his flock. They weren't allowed to have their way with him until he was at _least_ sixteen. They could wear down the walls he put around himself due to his upbringing, but nothing past second base until sixteen.

It wasn't until the next afternoon (he had slept through the hangover) that he found out who his newest flock member was.

Kazehana.

Number 03 took one look at her flockmates, then at her new Ashikabi.

He was the secret owner of MBI after having bought out Minaka, who was happy enough to pass on the more annoying aspects of owning a company so he could focus more on playing "God" to the Sekirei. He didn't hold the fact she had some resentment to Takami over the man, though he did find a better way to explain why Minaka had rejected her so thoroughly.

The idea that Minaka would rather play god than be an Ashikabi, even to an impressive specimen like her, was a bit easier to take than the idea he preferred human women like Takami. The fact she was also the mother of his children was a moot point. Her pride as a woman didn't like being dismissed so casually.

Even if she had to share with Karasuba of all people, at least her new Ashikabi was tolerable.


	4. Chapter 4

**Sorry about confusing 04 with 06. It was late and to be fair it's easier to remember names than numbers. Besides, both of them have gray hair.**

* * *

Takami had a headache, but at least Harry had the decently to pretend to be ashamed of the migraines he gave her. Outside of when weird things happened (apparently it was an inherited problem on his father's side...which explained how Minaka stumbled across that damn spaceship in the first place) he was actually a sweet boy.

However after he winged Kazehana, she had begun to see a pattern in those he 'attracted' as an Ashikabi.

Each and every single one of his Sekirei had anger issues.

Karasuba was a bloodthirsty sociopath who was barely kept on a leash. Haihane took far too much pleasure in using her claws on living subjects. Akitsu had narrowly avoided becoming a Scrapped Number. And Kazehana had her womanly pride trampled on because Minaka failed to explain to her properly why he had no interest in being an Ashikabi.

Minaka did confirm when asked that he was more interested in acting as the "god" of the Sekirei game than he was in participating in it. While it did smooth over the resentment towards Takami enough that Kazehana didn't insult her behind her back, there was always going to be some resentment to Minaka for it.

Of course that wasn't the source of her current headache.

Harry had apparently stumbled across a Ashikabi/Sekirei team that he took great offense to, and was now looking into ways that would sever the girl's bond to the brute that had forcibly winged her without actually removing her from the game itself.

It was a little known fact of the "game" that until a clear winner had been chosen, they were kept in suspended animation to be released a second time if they were removed.

Harry mentioned something about a "magical contract" that all Ashikabi 'signed' once they winged their first Sekirei.

In fact the only reason why he hadn't taken over control of the company and the Sekirei was because while Minaka pretended to be a madman with a god complex, he wasn't entirely heartless.

He tolerated the idiots who forcibly winged their Sekirei because he knew once the game was in full swing, the mismatched Sekirei and Ashikabi bounds would shatter and give them a second chance to find their real destined one.

Takami did feel some sympathy for Yashima, the girl Harry practically dragged in with her Ashikabi beaten into a bloody pulp. Whether he survived the encounter with Kazehana and Karasuba (and wasn't that terrifying, knowing they had come to an agreement and beaten the shit out of someone) was dependent on whether or not Harry could prematurely break the bond Yashima had with the idiot.

* * *

"Why should I help you break the bond of a Sekirei and her Ashikabi just so she can stay in the game?" demanded Minaka.

There were times when he was actually serious and worried her. This was one of those times.

"This idiot isn't an Ashikabi. He's a rapist who forcibly winged her because she had some phenomenally bad luck when she was released and he happened to take a liking to her. He has no right to enter the game or join the Age of the Gods, and he been abusing her from the start once he found out how submissive Sekirei are. I also caught him trying to forcibly wing a second one until we caught up to him."

"Bullshit. You caught him abusing her on the cameras and looked him up, only to find the laundry list of domestic abuse and sexual assault charges on him," said Takami flatly.

"That too. But I also looked at what happened when he winged her, and there was _zero_ reaction from her," said Harry flatly.

"You're absolutely sure there was no reaction? That he unwittingly joined the game because of his...bad habits?" said Minaka seriously.

"You can see the tape yourself. This man shouldn't be in the game, and with how badly he's been treating her she would be taken out with the first serious opponent she faced," said Harry.

"Fine, but only this once."

"I can add an extra duty to the current Disciplinary Squad to insure this doesn't happen again. It's bad enough that drunkard and his twins are actively trying to cut down on the competition by taking out the unwinged ones after they're released."

And by that he meant Seo and the lightning and thunder twins Hikari and Hibiki.

Takami rubbed her head, even if she did agree that the new added duty of the Disciplinary Squad would give her some peace of mind.

Harry was basically going to do the same thing Homura had tasked himself with, only for the winged Sekirei. He was going to keep what happened to Yashima from happening again, even if he had to take out the Sekirei so they could get a second chance after the fact.

Either way it was a damn good thing they already had mind healers and qualified therapists on staff, or that Harry had somehow managed to poach a good chunk of his own kind from Europe.

Something about how those who didn't come from inbred stock were shunned until they either left or took a dead end job.

All she knew was that Minaka had been a complete pain in the ass for a full month before Harry put the fear of Karasuba into him so he would shut up with the cackling.

If she hadn't seen a fraction of how badly the English were screwed up, she might have felt sorry for what Harry had planned for them. As it was, she was just glad that Harry was keeping her while sending the second best choice to keep Minaka on a short leash while he played "god" with the English idiots.

She didn't know why he went digging for old titles and land deeds, or what the significance of a rather old looking mansion with peacocks, or the castle near a massive lake and untouched forest was.

Any doubts that Harry was related to Minaka were dispelled once and for all when he found those satellite images, because he sounded _just like the idiot_ while he was cackling.

She did wonder why he was grinning like Minaka while playing a space game though.

"Fine, I'll help. But you do realize that in order to pull this off she'll have to be re-winged by you, right?" said Minaka.

"What?!" yelped Harry.

"There's a ten second delay before the contract takes hold, and in order to lift it long enough for her to be winged to someone new they'll have to be in the room with her. There's no possible way for even _god_ to find her true Destined One in that short a time period."

"...Let me talk to my flock and see what they think. If they agree then she can be added to mine and given some proper therapy to deal with the abuse."

Takami had forced Harry himself to undergo therapy for months after he winged Karasuba. He was surprisingly well adjusted, but the forced visits did wonders in helping him cut ties with his now former best friends.

Hermione had unintentionally encouraged him to rely on her for studying purposes, and Ron was a slacker who had some major jealous and inadequacy issues. And that wasn't getting into the meddling and inadequate protection Dumbledore had given him, or the fact that Snape was verbally abusive and took out his own mistakes on his students.

Takami was still amazed at how...sane...Harry was. If he hadn't caused Karasuba to react, she doubted anyone would have guessed at his true nature.

The scars of his upbringing were deep and well hidden, but they were there. This was someone who could take a life and would only feel a smidgen of regret or remorse. If that. And if they were someone he genuinely didn't care for, well, there wouldn't even be that.

Takami had never been thankful for the odd bonding that happened between Sekirei and Ashikabi, but in his case she was thanking every deity in existence that Harry attracted multiple partners.

Karasuba would have made things worse, Haihane would have been their enabler, and Akitsu would have watched it happen with a blind indifference.

Kazehana was a romantic, but she managed to bring the empathy level up at least.

* * *

"So that's the situation. We're going to try and 're-wing' Yashima to another Ashikabi, because that piece of filth shouldn't have been in the game in the first place. Even Minaka agreed he entered under false pretenses and lacks even the smallest amount of the necessary gene to cause a reaction."

"Who are you going to make her new Ashikabi?" asked Karasuba, her hand on her nodachi.

"There's only a ten second delay, so they'll have to be in the same room as her when it happens."

"You want to add her to the flock," surmised Kazehana.

"Odds are she won't have a natural reaction to me, but it's still a better option than leaving her with him," said Harry.

"I would say it's hardly romantic...but..." said Kazehana.

She had _helped_ Karasuba beat the man within an inch of his life when he tried to wing her. He got everything he deserved and more, and that was before she found out his 'rap sheet'.

"Is she a good fighter?"

"She's been horribly abused and the bond is barely a flicker of the true flame. So at the moment no, but I won't bat an eye if she gets some proper training. She seems to favor war hammers though," said Harry.

"Then we don't mind if you wing her. You treat us better than most would in your situation, and you didn't bat an eye when we dealt with that pig," said Karasuba.

"Just remember, until she has gone through at least two months of therapy she's off limits."

Yashima had been informed of the decision and was more than happy to try her luck with the plan. She could live with being in the same flock as the Black Sekirei if it meant getting away from _him_.

* * *

Matsu was doing her basic scan of the Sekirei list when she got an unusual update. At first she thought someone had gotten winged, but according to the schedule Takami shared with Homura that wasn't supposed to happen for another month at the earliest.

It took her a few seconds to find the new update, but when she did she scrambled out of her room to inform the others because of how _weird_ it was. She had to make sure she wasn't seeing things.

Homura took the tablet and read the info update.

"Ashikabi disposed of for violating the rules of the Ashikabi bond? Sekirei re-winged to..."

"Re-winged?" repeated Miya, eyes widening in shock.

"According to this, number 84 was forcibly winged by a fake Ashikabi. After he tried to wing someone else's Sekirei, they took offense and the matter was investigated by MBI. He isn't a true Ashikabi, and his list of crimes was enough to warrant intervention from MBI personally. He's been...disposed...of and 84 was 're-winged' to an Ashikabi with four Sekirei already," said Homura.

"The report said she's going to go through at least two months of mandatory therapy before she's allowed to leave MBI," said Matsu.

"Who's her new Ashikabi?" asked Uzume.

"Harry Evans. Minaka's second cousin and the secret owner of MBI, and the main financial backer of Higa Corporation."

Homura, who had been about to take a drink of water, damn near choked on it.

"WHAT? He's the owner of MBI?"

"And those Higa jerks?" added Uzume.

"According to the financial records Harry has tied most of his inheritance and paycheck into buying stocks for both companies, and even bought out Minaka a few months back."

"I need a drink," said Homura.

"Ditto," said Uzume.

* * *

 _Three months later..._

Homura was doing his regular patrols after another batch had been released when he noticed something cringe worthy.

Harry was interrogating Seo, who looked like he had eaten a lemon. Getting closer, he was able to overhear most of the conversation.

" _I get that you dislike the game that Minaka created, and you want to avoid what happened to number 84. But what you don't understand is that you're only accelerating the very tournament the jackass created out of boredom."_

" _How so?"_

" _The contract the jackass created with Miya without her realizing what it meant specifically states that the 'game' will only continue until one Ashikabi is left. And you're only putting the Sekirei you take out before they're winged into a coma without even giving them the chance to find someone compatible."_

Seo wasn't the only one who blinked. Homura did too. The Sekirei taken out were in a coma?

" _They're in a coma?"_

" _The 'crest' is an artificial creation meant to mark the participants. It had nothing to do with the actual Sekirei outside of knocking them out safely without harming them too much. At most it shocks their system long enough to put them into suspended animation until the game is finished. The winging process itself is so that they can mentally imprint on the one they've chosen to mate with, thus creating a soul bond."_

" _This is a bit over my head,"_ said Seo, scratching his beard.

" _You think that's bad? I found out by accident 06 was born a woman, but some jackass thought it was hilarious to make Homura believe she was in fact a he because the limited availability of male Sekirei turned her into a hermaphrodite!"_

Homura choked. There was no way that could be true. It just couldn't!

Seo looked as pale as Homura was.

" _Seriously?"_

" _It's actually quite common in certain animal species. When the ratio of male-to-female endangers the continuation of the species, then certain members of it can switch genders to insure that the species survives. Because Sekirei are able to imprint and mate with humans, the ratio is no longer as skewed so Homura's biology meant that they could change into whatever gender would be required to continue their Ashikabi's line. Unfortunately humans have established gender roles and well..."_

Homura heard enough. Having overheard that tidbit, he had a lot of thinking to do.

It was true that the number of female Sekirei far outweighed the males...there were only four in a ship full of a hundred and eight. And he was aware that certain animal species like parakeets could change their gender to insure survival if there were no available members of the opposite sex.

So the idea that he might have been a female originally wasn't _that_ far fetched, and made more than a bit of sense. It also explained why it had always felt so painful switching back from his 'female' self. And why he was having trouble finding an Ashikabi.

If he was supposed to be a female with the slight quirk of being able to shift between genders because of an imbalance of male-to-female Sekirei...then perhaps he was looking in all the wrong places.

Homura grimaced.

He was giving himself a headache.

In any case there was no way in _hell_ he was going to seek out a male Ashikabi, out-of-control powers be damned!


	5. Chapter 5

**Alright all my lovely fans! I have yet ANOTHER plot bunny, but I'm unable to make it even a one-shot properly. Mostly because one of the main characters is beyond my current ability to write. Shocking, I know.**

 **Anyway the plot bunny is this:**

 **Waver, still reeling from losing Iskander makes a figurative deal with the devil...in this case Zelretch. He wants to see Iskander when he was at his strength, not as the shadow that had grown on him throughout the war. So Zelretch turns him back into a child and sends him back to the past so Waver can see Iskander as he was, not as the one who had been more or less putting up with him because he needed Waver to sustain himself.**

 **Can include adoption by Iskander or just raising him as an heir.**

 **Waver MUST return to the Fourth Grail War a second time and try to fix things.**

 **How he turns out as a result of his adventure is entirely up to the one who takes the challenge. Whether he becomes Lord El-Melloi II again or a Lord in his own right is also up to the person who takes the idea. Happy Writing and be sure to include a link!**

* * *

Harry thought he should feel surprised, but mostly he just felt tired.

That and he was thanking every deity that the Sekirei had a gene that allowed the idea of sharing, because there was no way in _hell_ human women would be so open minded.

He had woken up with a massive hangover to find not the usual five birds in his bed, but _seven_. Two of which were boarders in Izumo Inn, and thus under the protection of Miya. He cautiously checked their necks, and felt only relief when he found them bare.

Why Matsu and Homura ended up in his house, which was just inside the territory of the Disciplinary Squad (exactly three blocks in all directions from MBI tower), he had no idea.

He got up and started cooking up what he considered an Irish breakfast. Which mainly meant it was geared _not_ to set off those with hangovers, which he could tell from here the two unwinged Sekirei were sure to have.

He kept the hangover remedy stocked for a damn good reason. Dealing with Minaka gave his liver and kidneys a healthy work out.

One by one his flock and the two newcomers wandered into the kitchen in search of food. It didn't take long for Matsu and Homura to realize who's house they were in, but they were too hungover to do anything more than groan.

"Akitsu, it's your turn to do the dishes."

"Yes Harry-sama."

"Homura, Matsu, Kazehana, drink this. Judging by your expressions alone I can safely say you have a grade three hangover."

Homura blearily looked at him.

"What's a grade three?"

"Right in the middle of 'mild hangover' to 'please kill me now and end my suffering'," said Harry blandly.

Kazehana took the vial and downed it without a second thought, before washing out the taste with more food. Matsu and Homura shared a look, before doing the same. Both promptly gagged, but the effects were immediate.

"What _is_ this stuff?"

"Hangover remedy. I keep it stocked because it's easier to deal with that jackass drunk than it is sober. And before you ask, no, neither of you are now part of the flock. You must have run into Kazehana and decided to go drinking," replied Harry.

With the worst of the hangover gone, Homura and Matsu cautiously started eating, before joining Harry's flock in wolfing down the food.

"So...why exactly _did_ you follow Kazehana all the way to my house. No offense Homura, but I thought you didn't swing that way?"

"I heard you talking to Seo, so I've been on a drinking binge for the past week. How did you find that stuff about me anyway?"

"Long story short your ship has an AI in it that hates the jackass, but for some unexplained reason likes me. She refuses to help the scientists and it currently waiting for the technology to catch up so she can walk around in a fake body. Until then..." explained Harry as he pulled out a fairly sophisticated looking device that had Matsu drooling, "She's stuck acting like JARVIS."

" _Hi! Call me Sakura!"_

"Dear kami, she looks like a nicer version of Miya," said Homura in shock.

"That was my reaction too," said Karasuba snorting. She had mellowed out a little since Harry had gotten over the shock of winging her...and told her flat out she was welcome to kill any idiots who pissed him off.

Or tried to force him back to England. He still got the _Daily Prophet,_ but he mostly used it to line the litter box for Yashima's pet cat. The therapist had suggested she get a pet to help cope with the trauma.

Riddle had recently made his big move, blowing his anonymity out of the water. And thanks to the fact he had Rita re-print the contract between him and Fudge in it's entirety...there was nothing the magical morons could do to bring him back.

The contract included anything from foreign hit wizards, squibs, to the relatives of the muggleborns. About the only thing that could get him to come back was if the Queen herself sent a request by a third party who hadn't been covered by the contract.

Which was why Harry planned to dump Minaka on them and pass along the offer to clean up the mess...even if it meant a mass hanging for the idiots.

"I still have a headache, though it's not alcohol induced," said Homura.

"Don't worry. Once the jackass annoys me enough I'm sending him to Europe and taking control," said Harry.

"Not that, though it does beg the question what you'll do to the Sekirei."

"The contract Minaka made is half-assed at best and fortunately came with a few loopholes."

"What kind of loopholes?"

"Minaka only came up with the game out of boredom, so if he finds something else to take his attention the contract becomes the property of the closest relative with a Sekirei. Since he has a son and daughter, he obviously planned to dump this on them. However both are currently in the country, which leaves me."

Homura stared at him.

"Seriously?"

"Once all 108 are set loose, and we're sure that your worst offenders are kept on a leash, I'll take care of Minaka without killing him. Let the English have the headache of dealing with him."

"Isn't that considered cruel and unusual punishment for them?" asked Homura.

"They allow a senile old man who thinks it's acceptable to use telepathy to read students minds and has an obsession with the greater good to dictate their actions. The same idiot who thought that not allowing equal force in a _war_ for the so called 'good guys', who at least took into account civilian casualties, was acceptable. I prefer to think of it less as cruel and unusual punishment and more as an unfriendly wake up call that they should really get their heads checked from sticking them in the sand so long," said Harry in a flat tone.

"...Seriously?" said Homura.

"The 'good guys' were only allowed to use tasers and nonlethal methods while the 'bad guys' who have a fetish for rape, torture and murder were killing people left and right for some Nazi bullshit. And no, I am not joking. I have a few history books that say what they did to people that didn't fit their view of 'acceptable' in graphic detail," said Harry.

"And what do you plan to do to the Sekirei once you're in charge?"

"For the most part, nothing. There are other non-human species that co-exist and peacefully live alongside humans, especially in Japan. Considering the powers involved, it's easier to have you all registered with the Magical Ministries. Especially considering the fact that most, if not all Ashikabi have Sekirei in their bloodline. I mostly came to Japan because it's fairly isolated from magical travel, they don't give a damn about the 'purity' of a bloodline, and most of all, because you can spot someone out of Europe pretty damn quick before they cause trouble."

"Magic is real?" said Matsu, eyes glinting in appreciation.

"Aliens exist and have been living with us for centuries?" countered Harry with a smirk.

Homura snorted. If aliens like Sekirei were real, then why not magic?

"Ugh. I can't go to work like this," said Homura.

"So why did you leave England?" asked Matsu.

"'The only thing needed for evil to succeed is for good men to do nothing.'" said Harry cryptically.

"What does that have to do with anything?" asked Matsu.

"In England there's a terrorist that has been active since the sixties at least. Rather than deal with him, the only man who stands in his way chose to make a club that does little more than spy on their activities and when they do have information, sit on it. I couldn't take it anymore, so I said to hell with them and left before they dragged me back in. I even made certain that they could never force me back into their one-sided war."

"It couldn't have been that bad," said Homura.

Harry leveled a look at him.

"The 'good guys' were content to use only non-lethal tactics and a slap on the wrist with some jail time rather than take out the threat. Meanwhile the 'bad guys' were all too happy to murder the 'good guys' and any unfortunate civilians that happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. They also made it a point to target anyone who didn't fall into their narrow view of the world, to the point they'd rape and murder children under the age of seven," said Harry flatly.

Karasuba suddenly snorted.

"Why do I get the distinct feeling that if you went back I'd be very happy for a few weeks at least?"

"You would be correct. If they found a way to drag me back I'd be more than happy to set you loose on them, no survivors. These idiots like to think they're superior when there are entire generations of children who haven't the faintest idea what the internet is, much less know how to turn on a computer."

Matsu was a tech otaku through and through, and as such she was appalled at the very idea of people living in the stone age _willingly_.

* * *

"So explain to me again why I'm here?"

"I want to introduce you to my son Minato. He could use the help getting a _normal_ girlfriend, and if what you said is true about your family's luck, then he'll get dragged into that idiot's retarded idea of a game before long once he's in Shin Tokyo."

"...Complete loser when it comes to girls, I take it?"

"And when it comes to grades, you're so ahead of the curve it's not even funny."

"...I'm not tutoring him."

"Even I know a pointless endeavor when I see one," said Takami.

"But I suppose we could hire him to help with the socialization skills of the more...ahem...awkward Sekirei on staff."

"You are not putting Karasuba or Haihane in the same room as my son," said Takami flatly. If Karasuba's killing intent didn't terrifying him, Haihane's bizarre penchant for cutting herself by accident with her claws would freak him out.

"Actually I was referring to Yashima and Akitsu. Yashima is starting to develop a phobia for all males except me, and Akitsu is rather..."

Takami shared a commiserating look with him.

Akitsu was a bit...odd. If her bust didn't ruin any chance of infiltration, her attitude would be just as bad.

"Are you just saying that because you're worried Yashima will pick something up from Karasuba and Haihane, or to break my son of his shyness?"

"A bit of column B, but mostly column A. As much as I love Karasuba's rather open personality and the fact Haihane is rather clueless about the fact she has a habit of wearing claws on her hands, the I have enough on my hands explaining to Karasuba why she can't brutally murder people and end their possible contributions to the collective gene pool. One is more than enough, thank you," said Harry.

Takami vehemently agreed on that point.

"It's bad enough I've caught her borrowing some of the spare uniforms," said Harry.

Takami winced.

"That sounds perfect! I was considering Benitsubasa, but having them all with the same Ashikabi to begin with sounds just as perfect!" said Minaka.

"Dear gods, why did he have to hear that part..." said Takami horrified.

"Okay, new plan. Bring Yukari to the city so we can corrupt Yashima in a good way before that jackass does even _more_ damage," said Harry flatly.

"Agreed. I'd rather have an Otaku Sekirei on the squad than a second Karasuba. I don't care _how_ effective she is! That idiot is bad enough!" said Takami, already dialing the number. "What should we tell her?"

"She recently got out of a bad relationship, but her current boyfriend has no idea what girls should wear. We can drag Akitsu into this as well. I can take care of the jackass if you can keep her from getting...ideas...about our relationship. Or I can help you be in two places at once."

"What's your plan for him?"

Harry smirked, before making a "V" with his fingers. Between them a loud crackle of electricity could be heard.

"Hello human taser. I can't get as high as a real one yet, but it's painful enough that he'll think twice," said Harry.

Takami's smirk was more than a little vicious. Then again she had plenty of experience with Karasuba, so odds were she was copying the psychotic Sekirei.

"By all means, use him as a test dummy while I spend some much needed time with my daughter."

"Remember, keep her far, far away from anything concerning S and M. Akitsu has a fetish for that crap and I refuse to deal with disposing with whatever your daughter finds in such stores."

"Deal."

* * *

"Mom! Who are your friends?"

"This is Yashima and Akitsu. Yashima's last boyfriend was a bit of a bastard, so be gentle with her. It took forever for her current one to help her with the flinching problem."

"And Akitsu?"

"Very limited social interaction. She needs to get out more," said Takami flatly.

She already knew that Kazehana and Haihane were discreetly following them, and that Harry had given them orders to protect and defend Yukari from any idiots who thought she was Yashima and Akitsu's Ashikabi.

She was already known to be the one in charge of recovery, and she didn't have whatever it was that determined Ashikabi.

"So what are we doing today?"

"I managed to get a rare day off, and I have an unlimited credit card. I have absolutely nothing to do today besides taking my daughter and two of my younger coworkers on a much needed shopping trip."

"Really?!" said Yukari excitedly. Her mother almost _never_ had a day off. Besides, shopping.

"Yashima's boyfriend said he doesn't mind if you convert her to an anime addict, so long as you reign in some of the more...bizarre... ones. Akitsu doesn't need the ideas."

Yukari perked up at that.

Today was going to be the best day ever!

* * *

Minaka considered this the worst day ever. Takami had delegated the task of keeping him in line to his currently _least_ favorite cousin. And wouldn't you know it, the bastard had been learning how to use a basic spell for children to shock each other, and he took great delight in overpowering it.

On the plus side, he had the fun, fun time of watching his board of directors piss themselves whenever Karasuba's boredom level got high enough.

Thanks to the fact Harry was the actual owner now, the company had only grown to the point it was seriously about to fold that idiot Higa's company in.

And since he had some Ashikabi on staff, he knew about the Sekirei. And it was only because Harry had been extra diligent in preventing "fake" Ashikabi from entering the game that his main rival hadn't become part of that number.

What pissed him off was the fact Harry took positive delight in using him as a human guinea pig for testing out the variations in voltage whenever he got off topic or did something outrageously stupid.

"Now, for the eventual takeover of the Higa Corporation..." said one of the sleazier directors.

When Harry came out of hiding, he was firing the lot of them and hiring competent people who didn't have an agenda like filling their pockets or stabbing each other in the back.

"Remind me again why I had to be here?" said Karasuba, taking out her sword and checking it for nonexistent damage.

"If I have to suffer, you have to suffer. And nothing says cut the crap and get to the point like someone who would happily commit mass murder just to get out of a boring meeting," said Harry cheerfully.

"...I'm going to suffer through a lot more of these in the future aren't I?" she asked.

"Yes, but you'll have full permission to make them all blubbering messes crying for their mothers just because they can't take a little killing intent. Countries were created through blood, sweat and death. If they can't handle you, how are they supposed to handle people trying to pull the wool over our eyes?" said Harry smiling, his fingers cracking with electricity.

That explanation made her happy. If she was allowed to be terrifying and set on people who tried something stupid, like steal from the company, then she could live with having to be bored.

"Didn't I give you a tablet at the start of the meeting anyway? Play _Mortal Combat_ or something equally graphic and enjoy the cursing of idiots from around the world," said Harry.

The sounds of people dying in horrifically graphic ways could be heard from where Karasuba was. However the board was no longer a mess and were able to deliver their reports without looking like idiots.


End file.
